13 Reasons Why
by serialkiller13
Summary: Loki Laufeyson is dead, he killed himself, nobodies knows why. so why 5 beautiful but dangerous looking women come and claim to know why, nobdy will ever be the same. Warning: Suicide,Attemped Rape, Abuse, and self hatred. Suicide Squad verse, only nobody knows about it until the funeral. There's a surprise at the end but you have to follow to see it and review.
1. Prolouge

**Ok so this fic has been in my head for a while and I wrote it down somewhere and now I'm typing it, so read at your own risk.**

** *o*O*o***

Sif was an avid warrior and was always on her toes when it came to danger, so when Thor came back with Loki supposedly reform, she didn't believe a word of it and deem herself his personal watchman (or woman in this case) and secretly followed him if he was ever alone. She kept watch over him like a hawk, and then one day Sif was following Loki into the woods and found him lying in the grass unmoving and not breathing, she immediately carried his body to healing room. Everybody heard what happen and was there waiting for the healer to come and give them the news, but who walked out wasn't the healer but a very disgruntle Loki who look fine…

"Brother, are you fairing well?" said a very worried Thor.

"I'm fine, Thor," Loki said with his eyes harden "But I would like to know, how I got there when there was nothing wrong with me?"

"Sif followed you into the woods and found not breathing, Liesmith." Fandral said with as much venom as a snake in his voice "You should be grateful, she saved your life."

Something flashed in Loki's eyes for a second, before he said "Thank you, Lady Sif."

Sif saw something in his eyes but continued to follow him were ever he went, Sif could never predict what she found the next day would so gruesome and it would be imbedded in her memory forever…

*o*O*o*

Sif notice Loki didn't come to breakfast in the morning and stalked out his room when she was done. Loki didn't come out of his room all day, so Sif decided to sneak in case he was planning something. As she enter his room she saw his things over turned and glass smashed to pieces, she got worried immediately and turn around to see blood coming from behind his couch, Sif drop her weapons immediately and rush over to see Loki's dead body in a pool of blood, Sif check him over hoping it wasn't what she thought it was, but her worst fears were confirmed. Loki committed suicide, and she didn't know who to blame.

She didn't know what to do so she screamed and tears spilled from her eye as she cradled Loki's body, The Warriors 3, Thor, Odin and Frigga heard her screams and rush to see her cradling Loki's body.

Thor and His mother drop to their knees and cry before Loki's body. The Warriors 3 and Odin's silent tears fell and their heads hung low.

*o*O*o*

Thor told the Avengers, who had become use to Loki, that he died and that he would take them to the funeral on Asgard when it was time. When they got on Asgard the place was drape in black and green, Loki's favorite colors, and they went into a large room where there was a coffin and large room of people. They were about to start when there was a flash of black light and 5 beautiful but deadly looking women stood there. The guards started to raise their weapons why Odin stopped them and asked in his booming voice "Who are you ladies and why are you hear?"

A woman stepped forward and said in a strong voice "My name is Sapphire and this is my team Suicide Squad we are friends of Loki's."

Everybody in the room started to murmur, Loki had friends? Odin shut them up with his staff and address them once more "Why have you come today?"

Sapphire look to her teammates and said "For two things, Allfather."

"Which are?"

"To see our friend and to expose the truth." Sapphire said.

Everybody started murmuring again, and Odin said "SLIENCE!" and the room got quiet as her address the woman again "What truth do you speak off?"

A woman dress in a Harlequin court jester outfit suddenly scream at him saying "THE REASON MY BEST FRIEND AND MENTOR IS DEAD, HE LEFT US 14 CDS WE LISTEN TO AND FOUND OUT THE REASON WHY I DON'T HAVE MY FRIEND ANYMORE, YOU BASTARDS!"

"Harley watch your mouth," Sapphire said.

The woman turns on her and said "HOW ARE YOU NOT UPSET, HE WAS YOUR BOYFRIEND SAPPHIRE, BOYFRIEND, HE LOVED YOU AS MUCH AS YOU LOVED HIM, AND THESE BASTARDS TOOK HIM AWAY FROM US, HOW ARE YOU NOT MAD THEY SLAUGHTER ONE OF OUR OWN!"

Everybody (including Odin) were shock to learn this information, but Sapphire said "Harley please…"

"NO!" Harley said with tear streaming down her eyes "LOKI ONCE SAID HE HAD BURY ENOUGH MEMBERS OF SUICIDE SQUAD'S FAMILY AND THAT HE WASN'T GOING TO BURY US AND LOOK WE'RE BURYING HIM!"

Then a woman beside Harley whispered in her ear and Harley fell silent and stepped back, as Sapphire address the woman who calm down Harley "Thank you, Topaz."

The woman nodded and handed her a bag and Sapphire pulled out a boom box and turn it up full blast so that everybody could hear and said "Nobody speak while I play the first CD, then maybe just maybe you will all reach some kind of truth."

And Sapphire hit the play button and Loki's voice came through the speakers _"Hello everybody Loki Odinson live here on the stereo, and I'm going to tell you the story of my life, or to be more specific why it ended. There are 13 people in this room who put the snowball in motion and I'm going to tell it one by one, starting with the first person. Are you ready Fandral?"_

Everybody in the room looks at him and thought the same thing 'what did Fandral do to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**What do you think Fandral did? Review please.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


	2. Fandral

**Ok I think I've kept you waiting long enough, Now that I'm on vacation I can write and update as much as I can so enjoy the story.**

** *o*O*o***

"_This happen after I came back from a quest with the warriors 3 as Thor suggest I should regain their trust but there's more to the story than that…"_ Loki said through the speakers "_Let's start with when we came back to the palace shall we…" _

_ *o*O*o*_

Loki, Thor, Sif and the Warriors 3 were coming back for a hunt and had caught some wild boar thanks to Loki's magic's and Thor's strength. Loki was going in another direction when Thor said "Brother, where are you going?"

"To change." Loki said "I'll be there in a second."

Loki walked in to any empty room and magic himself some fresh clothes on a nearby table and started stripping away his armor. When he was down to his tight leather pants and his boots, he took his boots off then his magic felt a presents behind him, Loki turned around to see Fandral behind him. Loki smile briefly before turning his back on him and said "What are doing in here you knew I was changing."

Fandral walk forward saying "Why do you dress in so much leather?" And put his hands on Loki's waist and move down while kissing the gods neck and Loki pulled his hands away and said "Fandral I've told you before, No."

Fandral had made advances on him before but he had back off when Loki refused. But this time Fandral wasn't backing down, instead he kept going and said "No secretly means yes in disguise."

Loki turned around and pushed him off and said "No Fandral as in N-O, No."

Loki turns around only to have Fandral's hands grab him roughly and growled "Now Loki…"

But he didn't finish his sentence, Loki push him off and punch him and kick him down, Fandral wipe the blood off the corner of his mouth and Loki said in a warning tone "Fandral."

Fandral smiled at Loki then punch him in the stomach, Loki doubled over and looked at Fandral who kick him down, and Loki felt himself getting picked up again and thrown into the side of table, then Fandral smashed Loki's head on to the table before he trailed his hand down Loki's back. Fandral quickly unbuckled his belt and Loki could feel his legs being spread apart but then a voice said "You pervert." And the sounds of somebody punching Fandral and beating him up in more ways than one. Loki looked up with the one eye that wasn't swollen shut that Hougn and Volstagg had saved him. Volstagg help him up but Loki collapse on the floor, pasting out.

*o*O*o*

_"So now you all know why I need to be carried to the healing room that day and why Fandral had a black eye, Fandral tried to rape me but failed miserably, now I know what you're thinking Hougn and Volstagg are heroes of this story, but you're wrong, they will show up later on one of the tapes but for now I will leave you with this piece of the forever growing puzzle."_

Then the Cd cut off telling them that the recording was done and everybody looked at Fandral who was looking at floor, then Thor pick him up and said "YOU DARE TRY TO DEFILE MY BROTHER!"

Fandral looked genuinely afraid and said "My judgment was clouded at the time! Thor please!"

Then Sapphire stepped forward and said "Thor put him to my eye level."

Thor looked at her funny but obeyed and set Fandral at her eye level and Sapphire looked him dead in the eye and said in a dangerous tone "You judgment was clouded, Loki just said you had made advances before, so why now hmm?"

Fandral didn't said anything, Sapphire turned around and backhanded him and said "After that day Loki had nightmare of you trying to rape him again so he put protective charms on his door and shields around him at night to made sure nobody enter without permission, did you know whenever he visit me I had to stop him from have panic attacks every time I try to get him to talk about it, did you know he started cutting himself again because he thought he was worthless because of you, he had been 3 year sober without a knife in his hands, speaking of his hands," Sapphire turn to address the crowd who was deadly quiet "Did any of you notice the cuts on his knuckles? Hmm? Anybody? No? Well that's a surprise. They came from him punch his reflection in the mirror!"

Then Sapphire turned back to Fandral and said "All because of you, you little mother fucker." And Sapphire said to Thor "Release him." And Thor drops him to the ground. Sapphire circled Fandral once and Fandral looks at her and Sapphire punch him in the nose. Fandral had barely any time to react before Sapphire kick him in the stomach and said "This is only some of the pain Loki felt, Fandral." Then she kicked him in the face leaving a very nasty mark, and Sapphire said "That's going to leave a nasty scar Fandral, every time you see it think of me and what you did to Loki, think of all the scars you left and the wounds that will never heal, the scar that will never fade because of you."

With that Sapphire walked back to her group of friends and said "Play the next tape."

Topaz loaded another Cd and Loki's voice filled the room once more…

_"Ok, by now I assume both Thor and Sapphire has kick the crap out of Fandral and Sapphire tortured him with her words of wisdom, now on to the person who kept the snowball rolling, Are you ready Sif?"_

Everybody in the room looked at Sif and thought 'What did Sif do to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**Chapter 2 tell me what you think about it, what do you think Sif did to Loki? Reviews only make me write faster, guys.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**

**P.S I'm on vacation so I can take prompts and write them on fan fiction, woooohoooooo!**


	3. Sif

**Ok I have kept to many people waiting for this, on with the story.**

** *o*O*o***

"_Sif I pretty sure you know you've following me everywhere I go, don't think I didn't notice I just never said anything, at first I thought you were protecting me from enemies, but I was wrong you think you're a hero for what you were doing, because you know about something that happen the first time and you didn't call for help you left me there to died, let start at the beginning…_" Loki voice said.

*o*O*o*

Sif was trying to find Loki since she had to go to a meeting with the council; she couldn't let him out of her sight. Then she heard his voice and started walking towards it, as she got closer she heard arguing…

"What why would I do that!?" Loki exclaimed.

"I don't know but it seems possible, Liesmith." A voice said she couldn't identify.

"So him almost taking advantage of me is my fault!?" Loki shrieked.

"Probably, if it wasn't for me you wouldn't have made it to the healing room!" The other person said harshly "Where are you going!?"

"To do something I should have done a long time ago!" Loki said "I'm telling Thor and The Allfather!"

"No you're not!" The voice said and Sif started walking a little faster.

"Hey let me go!" Loki said struggling against whoever had him.

Sif rushed around the corner in time to see Loki being push away and tumbling harshly down the stair. Sif heard bones cracking and a sicken snap, and Loki hit the bottom floor with a harsh thud and blood started steeping from the back of his head. Sif rushed over to his side, Loki's eyes were still open, but she assumed he was knocked out. Then she looks at the top of the balcony at the perpetrator and her blood runs cold at who it is. She looks down and stands up slowly and said "I never saw you today or Loki, I didn't hear an argument, and I didn't see him tumble down the stairs."

And walks away never looking back, because if she did she would have seen the tear from Loki's eye before they shut.

Later that day she hears Frigga screaming and knows Loki's body has been found. She doesn't feel ashamed or sad because she knows what she did was right, she was protecting the thing that matter, her friend and fellow warrior.

*o*O*o*

_"But here's the thing you were will to protect your friend who pushed me down the stairs, instead of help me get to the healing room, you left me to died, if it hadn't been for my mother I probably would have, so when I say fuck you Lady Sif, you know why. I wonder what happen the day you found me not breathing and didn't see anybody, if there was somebody standing above me would you have called for help or would you have left, hmm. I don't know and I'm pretty sure you don't know either, and we'll never know because I'm dead and you were probably going to carry your secret to the grave along with the person who pushed me down the steps, I'm also assuming you found my body but here's the thing I want to know did you leave me there for somebody else to find me or did you get help? I'll never know will I, Sif." _Loki's voice said before the tape cut off.

Everybody looked at Sif who was looking down at the floor, then Frigga came up to her and slapped her and scream "Why!? He was near death when I found him! Why didn't you call for help!? Why didn't you turn the person who harmed my son in!?"

Sapphire step up and calmly put a hand on Frigga's shoulder and said "Ma'am if I may?"

Frigga knowing what happened to Fandral steps aside and Sapphire looks at Sif, circles her and studies her for a moment and said "So you're Lady Sif, the fearsome warrior Loki talked non-stop about, how you were brave and loyal, and yet you were more loyal to this person of yours than help a person in need."

Sif stiffens and said "I…I did what was necessary."

Sapphire laughs low and dark that it's scares everybody including Odin, Sapphire smiles darkly at Sif who recoils a little and takes a step back, Sapphire steps a little closer to her and said "Then, let me ask you this, do you regret your actions towards my now dead boyfriend?"

Sif stays silence, and Sapphire smiles a little widener and says "Of course, you don't nobody has ever regretted what they've done to my boyfriend until now when his friend come for pay back, and they call me cold hearted."

Sapphire turns around Sif starts to relax a little but Sapphire turns around and does 3 quick jabs to disorient Sif and wraps her legs around Sif's waist and slams her into the ground before twisting her legs to come back in the upright position so that's she standing over Sif. Sif just stay there and Sapphire says "You know this is how Loki felt, helpless and then there was a spark of hope before it was crush, he was all alone left to die, so who in their right mind who call you a warrior much less a friend." Then sapphire walked back to her friends and said "Play the next tape."

Topaz put in another Cd and pressed play and Loki's voice filled the room once more.

_"Ok by now one of two things has happen, my mother has slapped Lady Sif or Sapphire beat her up, both has probably happen so I'll go on to person number 3, Volstagg my man you ready to get your ass whooping?"_

Everybody turn to Volstagg who froze, everybody was wondering 'what did Volstagg do to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**And that is it for tonight; tell me what you think in the review section.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


	4. Volstagg

**Ok, I'm typing and I nearly gave up on this story until tomorrow but I didn't, so enjoy.**

** *o*O*o***

_"You see, I'm not one for sparring, but when Sapphire and the Squad started helping me I couldn't help it, they gave me new power I know have cat like reflexes so I'm more flexible, I can do gymnastics and not sprain a thing, I can bend like no human nor asgardian can, but like it so I tried to use it in Asgard it unfortunately had dire consequences, this is where you come in Volstagg, let's start when the warriors three and Thor were sparring with me…."_

*o*O*o*

Thor had beaten Volstagg in the ring and they were jesting when Thor boomed "Brother you must spar with Hougn, you have not been in the ring the whole time we've been here!"

Loki look thoughtful for a second and said "Alright I'll do it." And Hougn got into a fighting stand and Loki did the same and the match began. Hougn came at Loki with a punch but Loki caught it, elbowed his ribs and swipes his legs out from under him and Hougn fell on his back and look at Loki dumbfounded. Loki smirked a little before helping Hougn back up, Volstagg watched carefully Loki's movements, whenever Hougn attack Loki who block it and manage to flip him on the ground with simple moves and help him back up. Then there was something Loki did that caught Volstagg's attention, Hougn was trying to punch Loki again but Loki did a backbend and kicked his legs up wrapped them around Hougn's waist and slammed him into the ground. Thor and Volstagg's mouths when hanging open as Loki unwrapped himself from Hougn and did backflips towards them before standing up straight again…

"Well that was intense," Loki said cracking his neck.

"Brother I didn't know you could move like that!" Thor boomed happily.

"I guess I've been practicing," Loki said "Now if you would excuse me I'm going to return something to the library." And Loki walked off. Volstagg help a very fluster Hougn up and mumble something about food and followed Loki to the library and spied on him. Loki was looking for something but he could find it so he checks out books on Sociology and Serial killers of Midgard. Volstagg was following him as he walked out the library, but Loki sensed his presents and he stopped at the stairs and pretended to tie his boots when he was really getting the knife he had in there, when Volstagg was 10 feet away from him Loki threw the knife and it hit Volstagg on his shoulder, Volstagg yelped in surprise and fell backwards. When Loki saw who he hit he rushed over…

"Volstagg!?" Loki said "Shit are you ok?"

"I'm fine," Volstagg lied, and Loki raised his eyebrow and said "You can lie to a Liesmith."

Loki puts a hand on Volstagg's shoulder and heals it up, and helps Volstagg back to his feet and starts to walk away when Volstagg grabs his arm and said "Loki what happen in the ring today?"

"What do you mean?" Loki asked confused.

"How did you beat Hougn in the ring?" Volstagg asked "Was it magic?"

Loki looks offended and said "No I didn't I beat him without it."

Volstagg just chuckles and said "Please Loki you couldn't have been him without magic, now tell me what spells did you use?"

Loki looks mad and said "Volstagg are you evening listening to me, I. Did. Not. Use. Magic."

Volstagg's patience's was running out and he said "Do not lie to me, Liesmith."

Loki just narrowed his eyes and said "Why do I even bother," and was about to walk away when Volstagg grab him back, Loki was so surprise he went into defense mode, as soon as he spun around he elbowed Volstagg's arm and punch him in the face, but he could keep his mouth shut and he said "Did take look like magic to you?"

Volstagg look at him at said with venom in his voice "Maybe you used magic to seduce Fandral and trick Hougn and me into saving you."

"What why would I do that!?" Loki exclaimed.

"I don't know but it seems possible, Liesmith." Volstagg spat.

"So him almost taking advantage of me is my fault!?" Loki shrieked.

"Probably, if it wasn't for me you wouldn't have made it to the healing room!" Volstagg said harshly standing up and Loki turned around and was walking towards the steps and Volstagg said "Where are you going!?"

"To do something I should have done a long time ago!" Loki said "I'm telling Thor and The Allfather!"

"No you're not!" Volstagg growled grabbing Loki.

"Hey let me go!" Loki said struggling against Volstagg, Loki pushed away and Volstagg let go and shoved him away but instead of rushing down stairs, Loki stumble and fell harshly down the stairs, Volstagg heard bones cracking and the sicken snap of Loki's neck breaking, and Volstagg watched as Loki hit the bottom floor with a harsh thud and blood started steeping from the back of his head. Then Volstagg saw Sif rush to him and froze, she look up at him and look back down at Loki and said "I never saw you today or Loki, I didn't hear an argument, and I didn't see him tumble down the stairs." And walks away, Volstagg looks at Loki one last time before going to the great hall to eat.

Later Volstagg hears Frigga's screams of pain throughout the palace, and when he goes to the healing room, Thor tells him Loki was near death, and Volstagg asks if they know who did it and Thor said Loki couldn't remember anything, but only Volstagg, Loki, and Sif knew that was a lie.

*o*O*o*

_"So you see Volstagg, I lied to protect your sorry ass, and now it came back, and let revenge of my girlfriend, Thor, Frigga, and probably Harley, rain upon you,"_ Loki chuckle and the Cd cut off.

Harley was the first to react, she punches Volstagg in the face and yelled "So you're the one who left him to die in the first place, why you little…."

"Harley." Sapphire said in a warning tone and Harley backed off. Volstagg pales as Sapphire walks up to him smiling and she said "You're afraid of me aren't you?"

Volstagg nods weakly and Sapphire chuckles darkly and raises her hand and Volstagg finches violently, and Sapphire said "Trust sweetheart, I'm not the one who's going to hit you."

Volstagg relaxes before he processes what Sapphire just said and he stutters "Wa…wait!"

Sapphire looks at him and he said "If you're not going to hit then who…"

Then a fist punch him in the cheek cutting his lip and a foot connects with his face sending him into the wall. Volstagg looks up to see Harley standing of him, with a mallet, Sapphire walks up next to her and said "I can say nothing to what you did, mainly because you just caused Loki pain, so I'm going to let Harley beat the crap out of you and knock you out, Ok?"

Volstagg looks afraid and Sapphire said "Continue Harley."

"My pleasure," Harley said puts down her mallet and kicks the crap out of Volstagg for a good 10 minutes. Then Sapphire said to her "Oh, Harley don't forget to dislocate his shoulder."

Harley picks up Volstagg's right arm and snaps it over her knee, and Volstagg lets out a pained scream and Harley socks him in the mouth and said "Maybe if you kept that big mouth of your shut, I wouldn't be kicking the shit out of you right now."

Volstagg spits out 4 out his front teeth with some blood, and Harley picks up her mallet and said "Nighty, night pudding!" and whacks Volstagg in the head knocking him out. Then she turns around and said "Y'all mess with my friend and mentor, hence me kicking the living shit out of you." And walks to Sapphire who was loading the next tape and Loki's voice came through the speakers…

"Ok, I assumed Harley beat the living shit out of Volstagg, now for the person, you're up Hougn, pray Harley doesn't kill you…"

Hougn paled as Harley looked at him tightening the grip on her mallet, while everybody else was thinking 'What did Hougn do to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**I let Harley Quinn kick the crap out of Volstagg; he deserved it, review please.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


	5. Hougn

**Ok, new chapter, so not all of the story is going to be angst, the last few people are going to happy and friendshipy, but here's the last of the angst (Probably).**

** *o*O*o***

_"Ah, dear Hougn, you might be the turning point of this story and probably the reason I died twice, yes people twice I've been dead before, the reason being Hougn killed me, over a stupid little secret that I would have never exposed, but I guess now I have to tell Hougn, isn't that a shame. Let's begin with when I was in the library looking for history books and records…"_

*o*O*o*

Loki was looking through history records and book for fun when Hougn came up behind him and said "I need help."

Loki jump and looked at Hougn before saying "Don't do that, dude; I nearly had a heart attack."

Hougn just stared at him and Loki remembers what he asked and said "Oh, what are you looking for?"

"Tattoo removal," Hougn said. Loki nods and said "Follow me."

Loki walks down stairs and crosses the library before walking back upstairs, crossing 3 rows of selves, before coming to a stop at the 4th one, Loki walked down it and climbed the ladder to the 3 shelve from the top and pulled out a book on tattoo removal and handed it to Hougn…

"Can I ask why you need this?" Loki said.

"No." Hougn said walking away. And Loki went back to his spot to he could read a little more.

Loki was looking for a book on psychology, when he turned a corner he saw Hougn's tattoo and it looked familiar, so he took a picture with his phone and sent it to Barbra before sneaking off pretending not to see anything.

*o*O*o*

Loki later got a message from Barbra saying:

**'The tattoo your friend has is from the league of shadows, the one Talia took over, but the tattoo seems to be from when her Father Raj was still in power, I can't do any digging because it's mostly paper and I'm a digital kind of girl, but I'm sending the files to you now.'**

Then boxes filled with paper materialized before him and Loki sent a quick thank you text, and started searching through the papers in his room, he search for hours on end, before going back to the library's records looking for anything about Hougn, and books on the league of shadows (Thank you Talia) before he found a connection.

Hougn wasn't present in Asgard's books for a period of time, and he was in pictures off the league, but Loki couldn't understand something, Hougn was top of his class in the league why leave the shadows and come back to Asgard? Loki was reading in the leagues history books when he saw something that caught his attention, in one of the books a historian had said 'This time in history is troubling a prodigy has left and another has be excommunicated…'

Did Hougn leave? Then Loki turns the page and gasped there was a picture of Hougn with a red stamp that said 'Excommunicated.' Hougn the Grim was excommunicated from the league of shadows. This was news to Loki he was practically running to get to his room when he open the door, Hougn stood there with his arms crossed and Loki froze and said "Hougn what a surprise."

"You know don't you." Hougn said.

"Yes," Loki whispered.

Hougn took a step forward and Loki step back towards his window…

"I was the best of my class, and they excommunicated me." Hougn said. Loki was pressed up against the glass and was afraid for his safety.

"You got excommunicated by a gang of psychopathy, Hougn." Loki said "You should consider yourself lucky." Then Hougn backhanded him and Loki got quiet…

"You do not dare speak of the great Raj al Ghul in such a manner!" Hougn exclaimed.

Loki just nods and Hougn continues "No matter now, I have just be keeping it a secret, a secret I will keep hidden until Ragnarök, and will do what it takes to keep it hidden."

"I…I won't tell anybody I swear." Loki stammers.

Hougn looked at him with menacing eyes and walks closer to Loki who was shaking with fear…

"I can't risk that," Hougn said stepping closer into Loki's personal space.

"Well… it's…. Not like you can just kill me!" Loki stammers out.

"Actually I can." Hougn said and Loki eyes grew wide and Hougn started chuckling and said "Gotcha."

Loki relaxed and said "You had me for a moment ….."

But Loki doesn't finish his sentence, Hougn pushes him out the window shattering it to piece and Loki falls to his death. Hougn looks out the window and carefully makes his way back to his room.

Below a cat starts licking Loki's fingers and a woman in black royal robes say "Poor Loki, come now Midnight let resurrect my daughters' friend before it's too late."

The cat meows and the woman place her hands on Loki and put her lips to his giving him a breath of life and said "Midnight give him a new power, new purpose and I hope he uses it wisely." The cat jump on Loki a starts licking his face and Loki starts twitching and the woman said "Come midnight let's go." And the woman left with the cat in arms.

Loki woke up a while later, sat up and screamed so loud all of Asgard woke up, but when people came to investigate, Loki was already gone. He walk back to his room like a ghost and slipped into bed with a very cut on his head from the glass he had been thrown through.

*o*O*o*

_"Has anybody notice the scar above my right eye brow, or the one above my hair line. Anybody, nope, didn't think so. That came from the glass shards that caught on my face, from when you pushed me out the window, Hougn. I am forever grateful to Sapphire's mom the queen for resurrecting me, but at what cost look where I am now, I've always thought I'd be better off dead, I wonder what took me so long to do it."_ Loki said before the CD cut off signaling the end of the tape.

Everybody was staring at Hougn who was nervously staring at Harley Quinn, who was smacking he mallet in her hand menacingly…

"Harley if you would please, break in Mr. Hougn for me." Sapphire said.

"My pleasure," Harley said punching Hougn in the stomach before whacking him hard with her mallet. Hougn crumpled to the floor as Sapphire stalked over to him with cold eyes, before she pick him up by his throat and slammed him is to the wall behind him and said "That's for threating him," then she twisted both of his arms and made loud cracking and popping sounds "That's for throwing him out the window," and finally she stab him in the back with a knife and said "And that's for killing him."

Then Sapphire walked back to her sisters and said "Play the next tape."

Topaz loaded up the CD and Loki's voice came through the speakers again _"Well, I assumed Sapphire and Harley kicked Hougn's ass, so now we get to the happy part of the story, let's start with the person who unlock my inner happiness first, are you ready Clint, assuming Thor brought you and the Avengers to Asgard."_

Everybody look at Clint who looked shocked 'What did Clint do to make Loki feel good about himself?'

*o*O*o*

**Yeah happy days are coming up in the next chapter, review please.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**

**P.S My new story Operation Clean Slate is up, check it out.**


	6. Clint

**Ok, I have thought so much about this chapter my brain hurt and I almost failed a test. But I pull through for you guys like always. Enjoy.**

** *o*O*o***

_"Clint, you thought me something I had ignore for a long time, let's begin, with when you followed me to the memorial site of the attack I lead on New York…"_

*o*O*o*

Loki was walking to the invasion memorial; he had flowers with him, and stood below the list of names. Loki sets down the flowers and said "I'm sorry." And stands there until he hears footsteps behind him and he turns around to see Clint Barton standing behind him…

"Uh…hi." Loki said.

"Why are you here?" Clint said.

Loki didn't answer at first he just stares at him and said "To pay my respects."

"Why?" Clint said confused.

"Because I have regret what I've in the past." Loki said with his eyes down.

"Ok," Clint said a little shocked at what Loki said.

"I know, I'm the monster people tell their children at night," Loki said "But I still feel remorse."

"Never let me hear you say that." Clint said firmly, Loki turn around and said "Say what again?"

"That you're a monster." Clint said.

It was Loki's turn to be shocked now and he said "Why? That's what I am."

"Loki," Clint said "You feel regret for your actions right?"

"Yes," Loki said.

"You feel remorse for the people you killed, right?" Clint said.

"Yes," Loki said not seeing where this is going.

"And you are trying to make amends for what you did right?" Clint said.

"Yes," Loki said.

"Then you're not a monster." Clint said.

"I do not understand." Loki said.

Clint sighed and said "Look Loki, real monsters don't regret what they have done and the don't feel remorse for what they did, real monsters don't make amends for what they have done, so you're not a monster at least your trying to make up for the wrong you have done."

"But what about…you?" Loki asked.

"I might not be able to forgive you for what you did but I can gradually start trusting you," Clint said "And maybe one day I'll forgive you, but now you're just taking a step in the right direction."

"You sound like Sapphire," Loki said.

"Who's Sapphire?" Clint asked.

"My girlfriend." Loki said unconsciously.

"You have a girlfriend?" Clint said.

"I do, but I don't want to talk about it." Loki said.

"Ok," Clint said filing that bit of information in the back of his mind for later "But for now how about I introduce you to beer and pizza."

Loki smiled and said "I'd like that, oh and Barton."

"Yes," Clint said.

"Thanks," Loki said.

"No problem and call me Clint," Clint said.

"Ok, Clint." Loki said following Clint back to the tower.

*o*O*o*

_"You made me believe in myself that day, that I wasn't a monster and that I could be redeem, I guess you spare my life a little longer, but I know you might not forgive me ever but as you said before I had taken a step in the right direction, sorry I had to cut it short."_ Loki said then the CD cut off signaling the end of the recording.

Everybody looks at Clint who was blushing a little, then Sapphire came up to him with her eyes soft and said "So you're the one who started trusting him?"

"And you're the girlfriend he told me about?" Clint said.

Sapphire smiled and said "Yes, you know he felt a little better about himself after what you said to him."

"He did?" Clint said.

"Yes, he stop talking about how he was a monster for what he did, and he said to me and I quote 'Barton, in a way forgave me, but he made me realize my definition of who I was, was wrong.'" Sapphire said.

"I'm glad I could make him feel better about himself," Clint said.

"I'm glad too," Sapphire said "Athena."

Then a woman who looked a little like Sapphire walked up next to her and Sapphire said "Clint, this is my cousin Athena, in my world she's a marksman and I had her create you something."

The Athena pulls out a jar and said "This is a powder in fused with magic that Loki made for me, I just put this on my arrows and then cut through anything and it makes them unbreakable, I now pass it down to you, Loki would have wanted you to have it."

Clint takes the jar and said "Thank you."

Sapphire smiled and said "No, thank you for trusting my boyfriend."

Then Sapphire walks back down and said "Play the next tape."

_"Ok, so I think by now Athena has given away the powder I gave her to Clint, so on the next person who made me see my life wasn't so bad, you ready Bruce?"_

Bruce started blushing a little and everybody else thought 'What did Bruce say to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**Oh happy days, oh happy days, lord have mercy happy days are here, so how do you think I'm doing, Review please.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


	7. Bruce

**Ok, now I'm on to Bruce, Enjoy people.**

** *o*O*o***

"Bruce you told me something I thought I never hear, let's start with when I was doing something I have never been caught doing, I don't know if it was fate or good timing, but I'm glad you came to my rescue Bruce…"

*o*O*o*

Bruce was looking for Loki to see if he could run test on his magic again, when he heard a thump coming from Loki's room, he walks in but Loki is locked in the bathroom…

"Loki," Bruce knocks softly "You ok?"

"I…I'm fine Bruce," Loki said his voice cracking a little.

"Loki did you accidently die your hair again," Bruce said "I help you get it out the last time, and back to the jet black color you like."

"Bruce please go away," Loki said.

"Loki are you sure…" Bruce said but is cut off by Loki saying harder "Go away Bruce."

Bruce starts walking away but grabs a baseball bat from the closet outside Loki's door and breaks down the door to the bathroom to see a gruesome site. Loki was bleeding out from his wrist and the towel we're soaked in blood and a knife stain with blood….

"Go away!" Loki screams at Bruce who had frozen. Then Bruce bends down and was reaching for Loki's arm to see the damage when Loki said "I can't stop bleed this time." And extends his arms and Bruce see that Loki had cut himself in different places along his wrist and upper arms. Bruce said "I'm going to bring you down to the medical bay and bandage those up for you, ok?"

Loki just nods and Bruce asked "Can you stand?" Loki shook his head and Bruce carried him to the medical bay and bandages him up and started asking questions…

"So, how long have you been cutting yourself," Bruce asked.

"Centuries," Loki said "I stop for about 3 years then I, how you mortals say 'Fell off the wagon.'"

"Why?" Bruce said.

"Something back on Asgard." Loki said keeping his eyes down and Bruce doesn't pry the subject.

"It's dangerous you know," Bruce said "You could have died."

"I know," Loki mumbled.

Bruce looked at him and said "You want to hear a story." Loki just nods and Bruce starts "Before you meet me and the other guy, I was at an all-time low, I just wanted it to end, so I put a bullet in my mouth and waited for the pain and heartache to stop, but it didn't instead the other guy spit it out, he told my he want to help people and I listen to him, so I decide to devote my life to helping people in third world countries then I join the Avenger and well you know the rest."

Loki was listening and said "I have tried to end my life before; I failed and ended up with the Chitauri, then well you know the rest."

Bruce chuckled at that and Loki smiled a little, then Bruce said "Well, we have something in common."

"I suppose we do," Loki said "But here's the thing, you can control who you are and who you want to be, I can't."

"You think I can control it," Bruce said "I struggle on a daily basses, I can't do certain things anymore like drink, jog, drink coffee, I can't have fancy pants, I can't have…you know."

"Have what?" Loki asked confused.

"You know, sex." Bruce said blushing slightly and Loki can help it he laughs out loud and Bruce blushes a little more and giggles with him and said "But I have friends willing to help me when I need it."

Loki's face fell a little and he said "But you see you have people willing to help, I don't have anybody…" Bruce opens his mouth and Loki held up on finger and said "Thor doesn't count and no he doesn't know."

Bruce closes his mouth then said "You might not have friends but you have something better."

"What?" Loki asked.

"Me." Bruce said "I'm here if you want to talk."

Loki's mouth twitches up into a smile and said "Thanks, Bruce."

"You welcome," Bruce said "Now come on I feel like tea."

*o*O*o*

_"You gave me something you could never take back, you cared for me and my well-being, after that day I stop cutting and if I had the urge I just got straight to Bruce, because he could sympathize, I always thought sympathy was for the weak, not Bruce showed me sympathy isn't just for the weak, it for the people who are willing to get better, sorry I couldn't have a talk with you about what I was about to do Bruce, maybe it could have made a difference, maybe not, but you gave me your friendship and that's all I needed."_ Loki said then the CD cut off signaling the end of the tape.

Sapphire walks to Bruce and hugs him and said "Thank you for being there when I could be."

Bruce blushes a little and hugs her back and said "You welcome everybody needs a friend."

Sapphire smiles and said "Diamond, can you come next to me please."

Diamond comes next to Sapphire and said "It's nice to meet you Dr. Banner, I have a condition similar to yours, but instead of a hulk I have an inner demon, that I let out in battle, and Loki made me something after I got tired of shrinking back to normal size without a bra and pants after a little rage moment."

Diamond pulls out a case with vials in it and said "These vials let you do everyday things that you have to give up, that includes sex." And Diamond winked and Bruce started blushing and the other Avengers snicker behind there palms.

"Thank you," Bruce said "I can't wait to drink alcohol again."

"Sure you can," Tony said.

Sapphire chuckled and said "Play the next tape before I throttle Bruce."

Bruce looked at her and his face went at red as a tomato and Sapphire said "I'm just kidding, my heart only belong to one person and he's dead."

Bruce started turning back his normal color and listen to the tape…

"Ok, I pretty sure Sapphire made a comment towards Bruce, and he's blushing like a cherry now, but one to the next person who made me feel myself worth and thought me to believe in myself, Steve you ready?"

Steve stood a bit straighter and everybody thought 'What did Steve say to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**Double updates, Love me people, Review please.**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


	8. Steve

**Ok, a little fast update for you guys, Enjoy.**

***o*O*o***

"_Steve, you are the kindest, sweetest person on the planet, and you were nice to me from the beginning and you gave really great advice, on how to handle something that I will explain to everybody, let's begin with that little late night training session…"_

*o*O*o*

Loki was punching a punching bag with all the memories and nightmares of Asgard in the back of his mind along with his own dark thoughts and then he punch it the bag so hard his fist with through it…

"Well that was awkward…"

Loki spun around to see Steve walking into the room, Steve step forward and said "I'm the one usually breaking punching bags."

Loki just turned around and said "Sorry, if I woke you up."

"It's ok I sometimes I just wake up at random intervals," Steve said "It happens a lot, why aren't you asleep."

"I don't need sleep," Loki said.

"Are you sure because Thor is knocked out right now," Steve said.

"I'm not Thor, Captain Rogers." Loki said.

Steve looked at him for a second and said "You don't sleep often do you?"

"Not anymore," Loki said unconsciously.

"What do you mean you don't sleep anymore?" Steve asked.

Loki realized what he said and told Steve "It's nothing."

Steve smiled sadly at him and said "You have nightmares don't you."

Loki looked at him and said "How do you know?"

"I have them myself," Steve said.

Loki looked at him and said "How do you cope with it?"

Steve shrugged and said "I talk to people about and when I don't feel like talking I write it down in a dream journal, you should try it if you don't feel like talking."

Loki thinks for a second and said "Thank you for that piece of advice."

"No problem, you know if you ever need somebody to talk to you can come to me, Bruce, or even Tony." Steve said.

Loki smiled and said "Well I'm going to go back to bed now."

"Sure," Steve said.

*o*O*o*

"_I didn't talk about my nightmares, instead I wrote them down and every time I wrote the better I felt, one day I just stop having the nightmares completely, you notice how I was sleeping better, and well, I have said Thank you one too many times, but just again thank you Steve for keeping them at bay, but some time thing relapse, and the nightmares came back but I know I could write them down and not be afraid."_

The tape cut off signaling the end of the CD Sapphire stepped up to Steve and said "So you're Steve huh?"

"Yes, ma'am," Steve said.

"Loki felt better, after what you said to him," Sapphire said "That why I want to give this to you."

Then the woman name Topaz stepped forward and said "I'm Topaz I can read people's minds, I could never invade Loki's because I promise I wouldn't, so when I found this, I know why he told me to keep out of his head."

Topaz handed Steve a worn journal that had Loki's name on it, he looked at Topaz and she said 'That's all the nightmares he couldn't talk to you about, and all the things he wanted to say to you, but he had a little too much dignity, so I pass on his thoughts to you."

Steve looked at the book and said "Thank you."

Sapphire nods and said "Play the next tape."

Diamond loaded the CD player and Loki's vice came through the speakers "_Ok, I assume Topaz gave Steve my journal, so on the next person who gave me advice, Tony are you listening?"_

Tony looked up, while everybody wonders 'What did Tony say to Loki?'

*o*O*o*

**This took to damn long to write, I was halfway done and then I lost my inspiration, but I back now, so review please!**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


	9. Tony

**Ok, sorry it took so long to update for this story, I have been too lazy, but no more! So I typed this chapter up for all my loyal followers, so enjoy.**

** *o*O*o***

_"Tony you a part of me, that I could never show to anybody, not even Bruce, but you kind of saw it by accident, I guess I got a story to tell…"_

*o*O*o*

Loki had slipped away from the other Avengers during game night, which Steve had insist was bonding, and which Loki responded by faking a headache, just so he could get some peace and quiet. Loki shut the door behind him and locked it, and then he stood in front of a full length mirror, and began stripping away at his clothing and left on his boxers. Then he let his glamor spell fall away, to reveal not his Frost Giant form, but the scars that litter his body from the years on Asgard. Loki traced over some of them, but mainly the one over his heart, from when he was pushed out the window by Hougn. The flash back came back to him, and he took deep breaths to make sure he didn't have a panic attack, and then he heard Tony coming into his room…

"Hey Loki, can I hide in here with y…." Tony stopped halfway and notices Loki's scarred body and said "Loki, what happened?"

"Nothing," Loki said about to put his glamor back up when Tony grabbed his arm and gave him a worried look and said "Did somebody do this to you?"

"No, this was a part of my past punishments," Loki said with his eyes down.

"What exactly were your past punishments?" Tony asked.

Loki mind went back to the torture he endure for centuries on end and he said "Lips sewn shut, venom dripping on my body, beatings, and a couple of other thing I do not wish to re-visit."

Tony blinked at him and said "So this was all a part of Asgard's justice system."

"Essentially yes," Loki said.

Tony's eyes roam over Loki's body and he then took off his shirt and said "You see this."

"The arc reactor?" Loki said.

"Yes, this is sort of my scar," Tony said.

"But you found a way to make it better," Loki said casting his eyes down.

"Hey, your scars don't define who you are," Tony said putting his shirt back on "Your character does, and between you and me I like your character."

Loki smiled and said "Thanks Tony."

"You're welcome reindeer game, now I have to go because you are killing my buzz a little." Tony said walking back to his room.

*o*O*o*

"_So you see I have a lot of scars on my body since my glamour magic died with me, but I embrace my scars know, so thank Tony, you did me a huge favor_."

Then the tape cut off and Sapphire turned to Tony and said "Mister Stark, I personally have something for you." Sapphire carefully took a vial out of her pocket and said "This will remove the shrapnel around your heart permanently, I thought you might like to have it."

Tony carefully took the vial and said "Thank you."

Sapphire smile and nodded and said "Play the next tape."

Topaz popped in the next tape and Loki's voice once again filled the room…

_"Ok, so I hope you enjoy your present Tony, now for the next person who deserves my thanks, Natasha, are you ready?"_

Natasha blinked and everybody wondered _'What did Natasha say to Loki?'_

*o*O*o*

**And here you go, up next Natasha! What do you think she did, Review!**

**Luv,**

**Serialkiller13**


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